FAIL.

 

 

 

 

 

What’s done is done.  I realize that I have been fighting for something that I have already lost in so many ways. My children have been lost. There is no chance of a happy ending. At this point there is no chance for a happy anything I am sad to say.

While the fundraiser successfully retained a lawyer, I was once again disappointed with the lack of effort placed into the case.  At the one and only emergency hearing that I could afford, The Honorable Judge Helenger looked at my attorney and asked her if she had read the final decision in my divorce. He was angry that she would sit next to me, and bring this case before the court again.

Five witnesses sat in the waiting room, but were not permitted to testify.

“What does the mother now do for a living?” The judge asked my attorney.  She was unable to answer. She did not say that I have worked at two separate minimum wage paying jobs to appease the court. She did not mention the many emails that I sent to her to inform her that I had entered into a partnership to begin a Multi Media Production company offering web design and produced commercial advertising.

She looked up at the judge and said I will defer to my client to tell you what she does for a living. He was angry and said “No, I want you to tell me.”  She couldn’t answer. The look on the judges face as she stumbled for answers said one thing loud and clear.

His face said that she stumbled for words because I was lying. She didn’t know what I did because I was and always will be a whore.

The issue was not addressed at the Emergency Hearing. It was set for trial.  Despite my best efforts, I could not pay for the attorney to go to trial.  I raised enough money for the retainer,  but minimum wage could not fight the good fight.  I still owe $2500 in addition to the money that was already raised.

You may wonder as I often have why I didn’t scream louder, organize another fundraiser, work three minimum wage jobs to further my case.

The truth is that I realized that I am fighting for something that has already been lost. Two of my children are independent adults now, and my youngest is no longer the little girl that cried for her mommy.  She is now a troubled fourteen year old. After the incident occurred, her father began a campaign to win her over and turn her against me again. He love bombed her, and I eventually learned of an elaborate plan to relocate her to another city.

What do you do when the children that you are fighting for look at you and say I want to live with Dad? The same dad whose drunken rampage resulted in the child threatening to run away. Cuts up and down her arms and legs. Kidnapping charges against me and two friends that picked her up that night. Her father gave permission but in his blackout failed to remember where she had gone.  My son was 18 and witnessed him agree that she leave but no judge would listen to witnesses.

No judge cared that in that blackout she was told again and again “This is all YOUR fault! I have to take time of of work every week to take you to therapy!” No judge cared that her cutting was known to her father, friends parents, and no medical attention was sought. No judge cared that despite YEARS of court orders demanding that he take the children to therapy that it never happened until I took her myself and lied to the hospital stating that I had custody and permission to seek treatment when the court order clearly states otherwise.

https://savethejays.files.wordpress.com/2016/05/heartbreak.jpg?w=450I have been prevented from receiving her medical records, consulting with physicians, or following up with her therapists.  I last spoke to a counselor when he became so abusive to me on the phone that he was screaming things right in front of my daughter. Screaming that I am a whore, a cunt, that he hates me and wishes I was dead.  I went to the therapist to address the fact that abusing me is no longer an option and that we had to work together to raise our daughter.

Alone the therapist agreed with me. Once my ex entered the room she changed her story and said this isn’t about he and I. It is about our daughter and the past is the past. How is the past the past if it is earlier that week?

There are options for women in relationships that are abusive but little seems to matter when the abuse occurs even post divorce.

My daughter no longer wants to visit with me. It became clear that he intensified his efforts at parental alienation, and making life so pleasant and easy at his house with little supervision or rules to follow.

There is no way that I can fund the legal battle. That just isn’t an option. So what are my options? I am not sure. For months I have been struggling tremendously with the realization that there will be no happy ending. The damage has been done, and there is no amount of therapy that can return the time that was taken from us.

My identity was stolen from me. I am no longer a mother. I have no children left to love me. My name is no longer Mom. Who am I then? What will I do next?

 

 

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July 7th

Just a quick update-

I want you all to know that I have been sworn to silence by my attorney during this long preparation process to once again ask for custody to be returned to me.

July 7th will be the first hearing date in this process.

I am going to say that our daughter is doing much better, and I am hopeful that things will go as we hope.

Keep your thoughts with us as this important date approaches, and thank you, thank you, thank you for helping me to make this happen.

Posted in Film Updates | 1 Comment

A Deal With The Devil

I am sure you are all wondering what happened to me. So vocal at one point, and then suddenly silent.  The truth is, I made a deal with the Devil.

Four months after the Final Decision giving custody to my abusive ex husband, I received a phone call from him telling me that he was homeless, his relationship with the woman that was so wicked to the children was over. He had nowhere to go, so he moved into my 20 year old daughters one bedroom apartment and asked me if I would allow my son and daughter to come and live with me.

I couldn’t believe it was happening. Could I really be checking on sleeping children at night again? I was overcome with excitement, and of course agreed that they would live with me. There were issues that needed addressed with the court though such as child support, and the parenting plan. Mr. Koontz promised to go to the judge to notify him.

First weeks, then months passed. For the first time he was peaceful, we were getting along again and I chalked it up to the evil girlfriends absence. She fueled the fires. It was so nice to have peace, that I didn’t risk going to the judge myself. I was afraid to lose what he had given me.

Months went by, then a year, then more. My son’s grades improved, my daughter was happy and doing well in school.  Then I became more and more upset that he was ignoring his promise to notify the judge. Meanwhile, child support racked itself up, and he was not paying for medical bills because of our agreement.

In August he was settled into his apartment and demanded that the youngest be on a 50/50 time share with him, and that my son stay in my house because he had no room for him.

I was exhausted, I was back at war with him again. I was so defeated from the trial that I couldn’t bear the thought of going in front of that judge again, knowing I would be unprotected just like last time.

I didn’t fight. I just gave up. I took whatever he gave me, and that was that. I wasn’t strong. I was weak.

I didn’t know how bad things had become for my daughter. I didn’t know that she lays awake cutting her body open at 3 am. I didn’t see the marks. Until October.

In October Jillian was visiting with me on my weekend and I noticed a cut on her arm. She tried to lie, but I found more. Soon I told her to remove her clothing down to her underwear. That’s when she said “I might as well just show you.”

What I saw was unimaginable. Scars covering this beautiful young lady, all over her thighs, up and down her arms.  Then I was told that her father knew. His help for his daughter? He yelled at her and told her not to do it again.

I kept Jillian home from school for a week searching for a place that I could afford to take her to without insurance.  I got her into a program, and she saw a psychiatrist. I had to lie and say that she lived with me in order to get the funding.  Since then she sees a therapist twice a month, and is under psychiatric care.

The safety plan that they developed included removing sharp items. Her father never did that, nor trimmed her nails which she uses to hurt herself. The cutting continued, but again, I wasn’t told. I thought that she improved after the therapy began, but the truth was  it was getting worse.

I text my daughter a song about happiness on Sunday. She replied saying Ya, I regret not being baker acted. I think it would have been the best thing to keep me safe. I called her and became so worried about her suicidal thoughts that I immediately drove 27 hours straight through a storm to get to her. On my way she text me saying that her dad wasn’t home and as usual,  there was no food. I gave her my credit card and tried to contact him because nobody had been able to reach him for several hours.

He didn’t reply to me, and instead called her screaming “Are you talking shit about me to your mom?” over and over. He bullied her as if she were a grown man on a job site, and yet this is a very fragile little girl that weighs 109 pounds.

She called me and was terrified, waiting for him to come home. She hung up with me when he did. The next thing I know, she is texting me that she is running away and going to a friends house. The story that she recounted reminded me of the days when I lived through his abuse. I feel so guilty that I am out of the situation, and yet my children are still living it.

They are afraid to make reports of their fathers poor behavior because when they were brave enough to speak against him at trial, it all backfired on us as custody went to dad, and the kids were punished for speaking up. What they took away from that was to never speak against their dad. So they don’t. They say nothing until I hear from one that they are running away.

I told her not to do that and that she could come to my house. I told her to ask her dad if my roommate could come and pick her up, I was still driving. He said “Fine, Whatever.” and went to “sleep” on the couch.

I had every intention of filing for an emergency hearing, and taking her to a domestic violence shelter. I took her to Melbourne, and initiated an abuse report which opened an investigation. I contacted CASA to arrange emergency shelter. I contacted a hospital to evaluate my daughter. They determined that her case was severe enough to warrant a baker act.

I met with DCF at the hospital regarding her father terrorizing her Sunday night.  More and more police filed in. They were nasty toward me and I began to feel the energy of the excitement that Police get just before they get to drag someone to jail, and realized the tables had turned and I was on the defensive. They began questioning me for the crime of kidnapping, making it appear that it was a part of the DCF investigation.

I asked “Am I being placed under arrest?” To which the meanest of them replied “You might be… you had no business taking this child away from her father.”

What happened next was a blur. The police were so mean and argumentative, that they said that they wished they could take me to jail but that it wasnt their call, it was up to my home county which did not issue an order to arrest at this time. The police told me that they are going to call my ex, and tell him that they will come to the civil trial to tell the judge all of the bullshit that I was spinning in there.

Bullshit? Apparently he didn’t take the time to look at the scars that cover this childs arms and legs.

During the trial her pain was invisible. It was only on the inside, and the guardian ignored the childs reports of her sadness and unhappiness living with her dad. They ignored her pleas to be returned to her mother.

My daughter has fixed that by destroying herself on the outside to reflect the destruction on the inside. There is no place for her to turn, no one that takes her seriously.

I am not allowed to visit her so once again we traumatize her. We take her away, make her feel alone in a strange hospital, and don’t even allow her a parental visit. The cruelty is absurd. Her father didn’t visit.

At this moment I am receiving photos given to me by a friend of hers from a secret instagram account. I viewed only four before screaming and puking. There must be sixty more to view. The worst of them they say have been removed. Probably by instagram. I am horrified by that thought, because these photos are disturbing.

So once again I am going public, and asking for your support funding legal representation for myself and others involved with the ongoing kidnapping investigation, as well as an attorney to represent us as we attempt to change the custody order.

The nature of this case requires a special attorney, I do not have a specific retainer amount yet, but I have contacted three attorneys that seem appropriate and will keep the financial information updated.

This has literally become a matter of life and death. Please help me save this child. I have turned to every authority possible, to no avail.

Your my only hope.  Please give what you can.

My deepest gratitude,

Tanaha

Posted in Film Updates | Leave a comment

Summers almost gone.

With the kids coming home from Summer Vacation, only one thing seems important. Being home with them. To do this, I have to change everything about the way that I work.

My plans this week include returning home and scripting interviews. I have been granted permission from the Woodhull Sexual Freedom Alliance to film and invite participants to be interviewed on camera.

I will be meeting with several leading researchers and activists to discuss raising a family in a healthy, sex positive atmosphere, and how/if children of  sex workers are affected by their parents occupations.

I have been fortunate to have had many doors opened for me recently as I pursue the question of whether or not Sex Workers can be engaged in a stigmatized and criminalized trade and still raise healthy, well adjusted children.

I am also visiting Atlanta to meet with  two parents that are not afraid to share a glimpse of their family dynamic, and share some of the pros and cons of being a sex worker while raising children.

twitres

Part Two of my plan this week is to begin filming job interviews, both with a resume identifying myself as a sex worker, and also using a resume that omits that information. Understanding the true reality of being a Sex Worker that is trying to plan an exit strategy is an important  part of the film, and yet one of the most intimidating to take on.

I think the common perception is that it is as simple as it sounds to go from whore to a 9 to 5 yet my guess is that I will encounter more than one challenge along the way.

I have been filming my tours for the past year, and am now ready to change the focus to creating a new life for my children and I, now that my son lives with me and my daughter is shared equally between my  ex husband and I.

It is a blessing, but I live in fear every day that he will change his mind and enforce the courts final order that allows me only the most minimal involvement with the children.

He has not yet notified a judge of our unofficial arrangement, so I am pretty much dependent on his whims.

I haven’t dared to try to push my luck and go back to the court myself, because I fear that the children may be taken from both of us, me for being a whore, and he for allowing the children to live with me outside the courts order.

I can’t possibly know that would actually happen, but I certainly wouldn’t doubt it.

I am at the point in the film that I cannot continue to work quietly anymore,  I have been providing for them since June and during the course of the past year my ex husband had a three month period of “time between homes” and had difficulty finding suitable living arrangements that could include both of the minor children, so he resorted to giving them back to me. Why should I still be under court order to pay him child support?

I can and have proven that  the children are safe with me and in a much more stable environment than their father can provide, yet on paper I am still the whoremom that is unfit to have custody.

Now more than ever I am motivated to return to court to ask for that to officially change.

Look for updates on the courts opinions as they happen and in the meantime I am no longer going to remain silent in an effort to keep the applecart from tipping so to speak by angering their father into removing them.

The fact is that I deserve protection from that danger from the court. My families stability depends on it. I have to stand up now and face the judge to ask once again to be granted custody of my single remaining minor child, age 12.

 

Wish me luck.

I still need help with editing. Tour footage is HD and my equipment cannot handle it for editing.

If you are able to assist, please contact me at Kelly@tantricfusion.com

I am especially desperate to find a way to remove background noise from a particularly meaningful speech given by The Honest Courtesan, Maggie McNeill.

 

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The children are home, but not officially.

In February of 2013 final order was made in my divorce, granting full custody to my ex, ordering child support and minimal visitation. Removing my ability to voice an opinion in important matters. 

I was so outraged that I launched a kickstarter project, that while unsuccessful began a project in my life that has grown much more important than I first knew. 

What you don’t know is that only four months after the Judge made his order, I received a phone call from my ex husband explaining that he and his girlfriend broke up, and that he had no place to live. He asked me to take the children full time temporarily, and promised to notify the court of the new arrangement. 

He never notified anyone, and the children lived with me for the next three months. He had difficulty being approved to rent having no income documentation, because he works under the table. He called me and asked me to keep my son permanently, and that we could share my daughter 50/50. I decided to take this deal instead of taking the risk of going in front of the judge again. It was terrifying to be there. 

He kept promising to go to the court to enter a voluntary change, but didn’t. It has been more than a year now and in that time my son has turned 18 making this a battle for my  12 year old daughter only. In that respect the battle continues, but having more to lose these days I have become publicly hushed. 

I became very quiet publicly because I was afraid to anger him into pulling the rug out from under the children and I and taking them away from me again. In actuality, there is nothing that would stop him from doing so.

I am contemplating going before the judge again to make the current situation permanent,  Still though, I have been filming. 

I have filmed my story, including touring, as well as my family. I have delved into  the speaking circuit filming politically active sex workers try to break through the barriers of Whorephobia. Soon I will be heading to Washington DC to share in the dialogue, and hopefully capture the efforts in the battle for Sexual Freedom being made by the courageous organization Woodhull Sexual Freedom Alliance. 

I am coming to the point that I am doing final interviews with Sex Workers and their families, and then I will be ready to weave this story together. If you or anyone you know is a sex worker or was raised by one, I would encourage you to add your voice to this story, and help me to present an opposing image of modern American Sex Workers and their families. 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Film Updates | Leave a comment

A response to @kalasprague

As promised, I am posting a reply to @kalasprague’s ridiculous tirade on twitter.  

Beyond this, I cannot continue to feed the troll.   My only motivation in posting this is

1- to document her contacts should some violence come my way during a scheduled appointment with a client, as I have tracking records of her approaching me pretending to be a client and schedule an appointment with me. Those contacts were forwarded to an individual in Miami, which makes me have concern that she may be contracting violence against me. Since the Police refuse to act, and the court refuses an order of protection I rely on this post to serve as documentation should I be met with violence as I fear. 

2. To protect my reputation and credibility during my kickstarter campaign. She has been public with lies and defamation of my character. I need to post this to prove that she is a whorephobic that is acting in aggression toward me, and her statements are unfounded. 

Now, Read below as we begin with the texts she sent me after Jon (my ex) broke up with her due to he increasing instability, even hacking his facebook to send messages in his name to high school sweethearts telling them to stay away. 

 

 

My responses are in Italic. 

Kala-   Good Luck in Court tomorrow. I truly wish the best for your kids and I have thought that maybe the courts should give you a chance. I could not imagine being away from my children like you have. I look back and realize that they may get the love and attention they deserve with you, cause they do not get it now. Good Luck. 

Me-  Thank you. And if there are any specific concerns, please let me know. His temper is always worse near the holidays, and when I learned of your breakup, I became concerned that his anger was getting the best of him again. 

Kala- Oh, his anger completely got the best of him. I have seen a side that I never knew existed. Even the look in his eyes was different. He woke up one morning and was a different completely hateful person. I hate to say it, but I am the one that took care of your kids, not him. I don’t know what got into him because we never, ever fought. I just feel bad that the kids take care of themselves. Poor Jess  is the other adult in the family. Jill always had to come to me for everything. Jon’s only concerns are working, and who doesn’t bother him once he is home. I was the one that did everything with them. And of course Jon’s biggest concern is who can he keep in his life that he can benefit from money wise. He is always seeing what others have to offer him. I drew the line the week before thanksgiving when I learned that his boss and a lesbian couple were paying for his car to get fixed, they rented him a car to drive down south with and paid for his attorney. You have to understand. 

Me- I do not travel anymore, as I know the kids will be with me soon. Traveling was a way to keep busy so I could cope without the kids. I have not done what you think I do in over a year. The Jon you describe is the one I know. Just be glad your safe and moving out. He is a sinking ship. 

Kala-  Yes, he is, He will end up alone forever. Just please know that I want what is best for the kids because as much as you did not like me in their lives, I took great care of them and tried to make their lives normal. It hurt me so bad to separate Meredith from Jill, because she loved having a big sister, but I had to do it. Jon started getting rude to Meredith and I was out of there as quickly as I could be. He is a miserable person and is never happy with anything. I don’t want your children to grow up like that. Especially Jason who seems just like Jon. Just please know I wish the best for all of you and it still hurts me that Meredith asks for Jill everyday. She asks to have a play date all the time, but I had to get out of there. 

 

So what happened to I am a horrible mother?  In fact, at the opening of the case his attorney began by saying we are not arguing that she is a bad mother judge, she’s a great mom, takes good care of her kids we agree to all of that. 

 

Now As I continue, I am only posting the worst of her texts as I do not want to spend my whole night re reading texts from a crazy person. 

I will post enough to prove my point and any further issues with @kalasprague will be completely ignored by me. I have way too many positive things to focus on right now, like social change. 

 

The following is regarding Jillian telling me that post breakup, Kala continued to contact Jillian and encourage her to walk to her house which Jillian had no desire to do. Jillian reported a tearful Kala waking her up after midnight to tell her about the breakup and tell her that Jon wanted her to move out. I contacted her to ask her to leave Jillian alone. Read below. 

Me-  Now that you and Jon broke up, please do not contact Jillian again. Further contact is completely inappropriate. 

Kala-Excuse me? You cannot tell me what to do. 

Me- I don’t think it was appropriate for you to wake her in the middle of the night crying to discuss your failing relationship, and if you continue to contact my daughter, I will seek an order of protection from the court. 


Kala- Go for it! You have no idea what you are talking about and I don’t care about you. Your opinions have never mattered to me. The fact that you were a hooker and that Jon allowed it mattred to me and that is why I got away from your dysfunctional family. Your poor children have no chance in life with you as their mother. Hopefully they don’t end up like you. I will do whatever I want to be able to see who I considered my step daughter.

Me- I am asking you nicely to move on with your life, and leave my daughter alone. It is not appropriate for you to maintain contact. You are unstable, as evidenced by your waking Jillian to hear your tearful account of your breakup with her father. She was only nine years old whey you did that. My children have gone thru enough with you two. Please, just leave her alone. 

Kala- haha- I never discussed anything with her and she is more damaged by what you and Jon have done to her than anything I ever did. I love her and she knows that. Believe me, I was not tearful about breaking up with him. 

Me- Is it your intention to continue contact with her?

Kala- It is my intention to discontinue contact with you. 

Me- You have been asked. She is Jon and I’s daughter, you are an ex girlfriend. I’m asking you to leave my daughter alone, so has Jon. Please respect our wishes for our child. 

Kala-Jon has asked no such thing of me, and what we discuss is none of your business. I just got off the phone with him and he wants you to go away. 

 

The following day is when I received the supportive text messages listed above. 

 

dozens of texts were exchanged in this way including these highlights-

Kala- Don’t you ever try to see Jillian at school again, As we explained to the school you are not allowed there because it is not an approved visit. Judges orders do not expire. And you still do not have any custody whatsoever. therefore, you cannot pick and choose when you can be around the kids. Do not ever try this again. You will only embarress yourself. Until this is settled in court, you will now have only what the judge ordered because that order still stands. And yes, I may be Jon’s paramour, but I was never a whore. Can’t wait til that comes out. Especially the things you have no idea that we know. I have done so much research on you and you are a disgrace. 

Kala- Ha ha- Your a tax paying business owner? Then Jes can use your tax info for college. I am helping him more than you know but you are not smart enough to know things on my level. We do not worry about you coming into their lives because it can’t happen. I*f you were a caring parent you would have finished your case plan. I know that is the biggest black mark against you and you cannot fix your wrongdoings. We love that you are not in town to harass us the way you always do. Hope you forward this to your attorney so he sees that you do harass us asking for visits that you have no right to. By the way we are going away on a family vacation for the holiday weekend just in case you had any ideas about asking for your 10 min. visit. Yes, We are a happy family. 

Kala- Do not contact us again. You have no rights since you do not follow the rules to have rights. 

ME-A great life of being ignored, left home alone with no phones, no dental or medical care, no access to to their mother, no glasses for over a year, no food in the house? Unfair treatment? Listening to the adults in the home having sex so clearly they hear your words? Having their belongings and piggy banks stolen by the adults? Her brand new wii broke mysteriously? I understand your decision justice Kala, but I plan to appeal with a real judge in a real court. Where the mistakes dcf and my lawyer made will be heard. I’m not afraid of you. Again. Stop texting me. 

 

 

ksnostress@hotmail.com
10/9/12

 
to me
 
 
 
 
From: ksnostress@hotmail.com

You can run but you can’t hide. Found you.  Won’t the judge and everyone involved love to see this and all the others I have printed.  What a dirty whore……  No wonder you are not mother material, you can’t even take care of yourself.

 
Me-  Excuse me please?
 
kala sprague <ksnostress@hotmail.com>
10/11/12

 
to me
 
 
 
 
Interesting, that is all you have to say?  Just wanted to let you know that just a little research can come up with alot of dirty results.  So sorry T-Dawgs BBQ didn’t work out, but that is not a surprise.  Funny how in court you claim that you are no longer a whore, but your ads are everywhere under the guise of helping people with their sex lives.  One ad even says that you started working as whore at the age of fifteen and was in adult films.  What sort of role model do you think you are?  Do you accept work while you have the kids?  Lucky for them that is not too often because a garage apartment is a horrible place to raise a family.  It is a shame that you always blame others for your own short comings, but you are the only one to blame for your life that has no promising future.  In court you claim to be a perfect person, but in the real world you are a street worker that gets paid by the hour for being a whore.  Your last ad was placed just last week, yet you lie under oath saying that you are as clean as whistle.  You are absolutely disgusting and don’t fool anyone but yourself.  It is a shame that you have resorted to asking your children to lie for you.  It is also a shame that you lie under oath about things that you know are an absolute lie just to buy yourself some time. Don’t worry Ms. Kelly Michaels (the name is also a lie) you cannot hide anything, someone is always watching.  Every bad choice you have made will always come back to haunt you, even issues that have been left behind in other states.  As you should know by now, people like myself that have nothing to hide always win, people like you get deeper and deeper into their rotten hole where they belong. 
 
At the time when this message was sent is when she was forwarding our communications to a party in Miami, and simultaneously emailing me pretending to be a client and trying to schedule an appointment with me. It had to be that weekend. Money was no object. I am convinced  that she had someone that was going to meet me at that appointment and harm/kill me. 
 
 
More recently I am receiving these messages-
 
(727) 488-2461 <19376969674.17274882461.rK7W3LKTbQ@txt.voice.google.com>
Mar 26

 
to me
 
 
 
 
Hi kelly Michaels, just heard your message on your voice mail and it said you prefer texts.  Glad to see that you still have an active number on your website.  Atleast it shows that you are still working as an escort.  I suppose you surely would not want to lose any business since it says you charge up to $200 per hour.   You should have no trouble paying your child support since your hourly rate is so high.  I just wanted to let you know that i love all your websites, you should be proud of yourself and the life you have made for yourself.  Anyway I called your hotline because I wss hoping you would answer so I could  let you know that when you have a problem with me please contact me directly so we can end this once and for all.  Do not have Jason jump out of the car to speak to me when you are driving illegally, do not have your girlfriend drop you off at the corner to avoid hearing what i have to say, and do not speak to jon about what you think i have done that is wrong!
 .  As you well know I am not the one that ever does anything wrong.  All I do is gather the evidence of what you are doing wrong.  Which is always something.  I can take pictures of whatever I want and there is nothing illegal about it.  I have had enough of your behavior and the fact that you think you are always right and that the world revolves around you.  I am done with your nonsense of not following court orders and the shit you try to pull all of the time.  Why dont you grow a set of balls and stop hiding behind everyone else and contact me since you feel the need to discuss me with everyone else.  I cannot wait for you to move away or get put away for lack of payments.   Atleast if you go away your children will finally have a chance at a normal life which is what jon and i provide for them.  With you around all you create is chaos.  And dont worry, you cant submit this into evidence as another try at cyber stalking since this is my first and only text to you.    ka!
 la
 
 

(727) 488-2461 <19376969674.17274882461.rK7W3LKTbQ@txt.voice.google.com>
May 16 (4 days ago)

 
to me
 
 
 
 
I just have to tell you that as a mother I think that the reviews about your “work” on the erotic review website are disgusting.  “i put the money on the table while she got undressed”. “she met me at the door in only a towel and kissed me passionately.”  You are so disgusting that I cannot believe that in your head you think that you are a normal person who thinks that what you do is ok.  Oh and the services you offer to VIP members are real classy.  So glad to see that you always fail to say you still have this “work” number available when others are trying to reach you.  Your children can’t reach you most of the time but your customers sure can.  glad to see you are keeping up with your work also since one last update was just done may 13th.  must be busy in colorado if that is where you really are.  your children don’t seem to be that important to you though since you never show up on wednesdays and you have even skipped weekends.  What would you have done if you had got!
 ten custody?  Subjected them to the tantric fusion lifestyle?  I am so glad that I am the one that gets to lead their lives in the right direction along with their father because if they followed in your footsteps you would probably encourage them to lead the lifestyle that you do.  You started at Jill’s age right? I can only imagine what you would do if you had custody since you think there is nothing wrong with what you do.   twitter this you whoremom!
 
 
Now add these examples to the HUGE twitter war that she caused over the weekend, a ton of phone calls from restricted numbers, and showing up at church causing us to exit quietly through a side door to avoid a confrontation only to be chased at full sprint by this woman with her camera outstretched and pointed at us as we tried to leave. 
 
I have been bullied enough. I was contacted by the police today that told me that they have no intention of making an arrest, therefore I will not continue to tire myself by making reports. I will just document here, and if something happens to me, hopefully she will be held accountable then. 
 
As for my words on @kalasprague, this concludes them.   My focus is on initiating positive social change, and immersing myself in activism. I will not comment on any of her future immaturity. 
 
Thank you for understanding. 
 
 
 
 
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What is a “Whore”?

I have been asked in more than one interview now why I claim the title whore, when I am no longer involved in prostitution.

The answer is simple.  Once a whore, always a whore.  Society has placed that label upon me, and I will never escape it. I claim it because I am not ashamed. It doesn’t hurt me that they call me that. The title “Whore” has a proud, and even spiritual history. From the Hetarai, to the Temple Prostitutes.

My own experiences as a Sex Worker began when I was only fifteen years old. How old were you when you began your career? Think about how you have grown and progressed over its course. How is your career different today then it was when you accepted your first job?

I had the same experience in my career, the difference is that I am a sex worker. I began as a child on the beach of Fort Lauderdale waiting to turn 18 so I could get hired by an escort service. From working for an agency I began to work independently via magazines in the nineties as well as dancing in clubs, and shooting a few adult films. After a long marital hiatus, I returned to working independently as an escort but this time was through internet classifieds. From internet classifieds I developed a web site. Once the website launced I began to write erotica, and study Tantra.

A whole new chapter began with the launch of Nymphtalk, when I began podcasting an adult radio show, and writing erotica for 5000 fans.

I began to change, and mature in my own sexuality and did so through Tantra. It was an important discovery that helped me grow as a person, and I wanted to share it. I began teaching Tantric Fusion to individuals at first. Then couples, then groups.

I am now in the R&D phase of a retail endeavor that takes the new Tantra based method of lovemaking that I developed over several years and teaches it to couples in the privacy of their own home.

See the progression away from prostitution itself into different areas of sex work? The Adult Industry is vast, and there are many sex workers in various positions within that industry. Phone sex workers, cam girls, strippers, and porn stars. Escorts, hookers, Somatic Sexologists, and more. There is room for growth within the adult industry for prostitutes, just like there is room for growth in other industries.

My place in that industry currently is within a small niche of individuals that want to be able to foster a truly intimate and deep connection to another human being and foster a deeper embodiment of their own sexuality.  This is where I excel. I am a compassionate and nurturing soul, and found that sharing Tantric Fusion was my calling.

Maggie compares it to the food service industry. A hot dog cart vendor is going to have a completely different experience than the owner of a five star restaurant. There are sex workers in all different positions, marketing all different forms of sexual entertainment, and I am one of them.

I put the entire industry on a back burner however, and opened a restaurant and catering business.  I ran that business for a year and a half working so hard and coming home dirty and exhausted, yet in court I was still judged as a whore.

So if I am always going to be a whore no matter my occupation,  then I choose to make sex work my occupation. Why would I want to have less pay and worse working conditions when as a sex worker I am free to make my own hours, and rate of pay? I can take days off when I want, and work when I want. I can refuse any client I don’t want to see, and not worry about losing my job.

 

I may only work 1-3 days a week, then I am free then to pursue my other endeavors such as writing,  documentary films, Art Shows, and activism.

Why is it okay to live with or sleep with a man for a meal and a warm bed, but wretched if you prefer to be paid and return to your own home to eat, and sleep in a warm bed?

In societies eyes it is much better if I allow the male to maintain control over me and offer up my body as my sacrament to him, the almighty male provider.

What happens to societies views however when I take the control back from the male requiring payment and deciding how to spend it myself? Well, then I am a whore- for life.

It is because we live in a Patriarchal society that fears the power of a woman that can create wealth on her own, with no help from a male or a corporation. Imagine the shift in power that it could cause.

Read about the Golden Age of Greece when the only women that were allowed to be in public, at a market, or theater were the Courtesans. They developed great wealth and had freedom that the “good women” envied as they were shuffled to the back room of the house when company arrived.

Women admired whores then. It was a different world.

My life was shaped like many of yours were in my teenage years. Sex Work is what works for me. It is what I know, what I can support myself doing, and what makes me happy.

I call myself a sex worker. But I proudly carry the title of “Whore” for life and dare anyone to try to hurt me with its implications. I claim the word. As I claimed “Whoremom” and the attempts to hurt me by hurling those words as insults is as effective as if I wanted to hurt your feelings by calling you beautiful.

 

 

 

 

 

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